confused. not sure. what else?

got back my results and i know i dont like them. but i cant do anything about it now right? it sucks big time, especially when you know you cant go into the dream school that you have been dreaming day and night. i'm now stuck in between no where. going to a better school where everyone mugs like siao, or going to a lousier school but no-so-mugger type. i'm lost. seriously. sigh.


but!
i went out with amanda, jiaqi, sera, jian zheng, muhammad and xuan ming for dinner to celebrate amanda's birthday. well, i hope it's the best of the best for amanda. :) and they made me laugh and forget about my results that what seems to me like shit.
*i know i'm being a sucker here for those who know my marks, but i guess it's family pressure and my own expectations that i've set for myself, which was obviously too high for a sucker like me.*

and now i feel, i feel...
urgh.
i just dont know how to describe this feeling.
your presence at the mrt station shocked me.
but i'm sorry for not even letting you talk.
and tonight's conversation was just not what i expected.
and i'm sorry for sounding so rash and temperamental..
it's just that i'm more concerned for my future than to answer you right at that moment.
i'm just sorry.
and that's all i can say for now.